Both of my children are what I call “neurospicy,” and if you met them, you’d agree. They are definitely spicy.
My daughter was speaking full sentences at a year old and reading at three. My son was reading at a year old–but didn’t really speak until he was three, and that was after we rigorously pursued speech therapy when he was two. Other than communicating, my son was mostly on the pediatrician’s schedule, and my daughter was always ahead of schedule on everything. Thanks to his love of Numberblocks, my son was doing math–multiplication and division even–at two. (Both of my kids were hyperlexic; my son was hyperlexic and hypernumeric.)
But while my daughter’s motor skills were on point from the beginning, my son’s lagged significantly behind. He was a COVID baby, and he has no formal diagnosis. Just “COVID baby.”
After 21 months of in-home speech therapy, my son’s speech had significantly improved. I decided around that time that we should pursue occupational therapy, but for a host of reasons, I haven’t. He absolutely hates leaving home, and he gets incredibly carsick, so going to therapy is just not something that I felt positive about. But I felt guilty, so we have slowly worked on things at home. We’re still working on consistently using appropriate grip, but he can write all the letters on his own. .
He’s about a year behind schedule, but let me say this, something I saw several years ago on the social media of Diary of a Mom: Today is not forever.
Just because your child does not drink from an open cup, eat “appropriately,” use the bathroom as expected, hold a pencil, etc., does not mean that the situation will remain that way forever. My child ate solids late because of choking issues. Then he became a mouth stuffer, and he nearly choked multiple times as a result. He refused to eat anything but snacks and chicken for a while. He could not drink from an open cup, so we used Thermoses until he was four years old. Potty training was incredibly difficult–he was just under five years old when he mastered it.
But we all go through life at our own schedules, right? Today is not forever. Give kids the grace to have delays from what the developmental tables indicate–but make sure those kids have the support and resources they need if they aren’t meeting those developmental landmarks. Cheer the successes, regardless of whether they are on your pediatrician’s schedule!
Are you interested in a list of resources we found helpful with our “special needs” son–an incredibly bright child who read at one year old and did multiplication and division at age two, but who had delays in speech, feeding, toileting, and motor skills? Here is a link.
Best wishes,
Erin
